To thrive and lead a fulfilling life, I believe we need to nurture the most important relationship in our life – the one we have with our Self!

January, the “longest” month is finally over! Welcome to February – the shortest month. The days are getting longer, the sun is out more often and we slowly prepare for the Spring. This edition is dedicated to celebration because the Self-Expedition turns four, and also because celebration rewires our brain.

Let me begin by telling you my news…

Four years ago I got the courage, modeled some styles that I found cool from here and there, created a kind of a format that resonated with me and began writing. The Self-Expedition was born. Today, four years later, as I began writing this celebratory edition I got curious what happens to our brain when we are four years old. Did you know that at age four, a child’s brain undergoes rapid development, leading to enhanced executive function, advanced language skills, and improved emotional regulation?This is when better logical thinking, spatial awareness, and empathy are developed. Our brain is a fantastic machine and the more we learn about it, the more we can utilize it for our benefit.

Now, just like the four year brain undergoes a big change, so the Self-Expedition Newsletter is changing. Let’s call it a “dramatic facelift” 🙂 I hope you like the new style and flow.

There are many new and exciting projects I am working on this year and I can’t wait to tell you all about them. One of those projects, at the beginning of April, is the Kosovo edition of the Women of Impact Leadership Programme. Thus, if you are a female leader, or know one in the region that needs empowerment, strong network and relevant skills to thrive in today’s world, then join us or recommend us. This photo below is from the current group of leaders in the program in Skopje.

On a more personal note, I won a new client today and the win felt bitter. A weird feeling. I expected that feelings of celebration should have appeared, but something completely opposite showed up in me. To label the emotion it would be: disappointment. The voice in my head started questioning: Where does this come from? I trusted someone in their judgement and decided to let go of control. The result, in my perception, a catastrophe! And, it happened again – just like years ago when I was in a similar situation. The reasonable voice questioned again: How scary is this catastrophe? And, how do I know it will be the same like in the past? What’s different today?

Lately, I find myself often aware of the spiral of life – knowing that existence is not a straight line, but a continuous, cyclical journey of growth, evolution, and returning to familiar themes with new understanding. Maybe there is simply a different path, and for sure there is a lesson to be learned!

Now, I know a few things about the brain, so I didn’t allow myself to dwell long on the disappointment. Not much use in it. I heard Chris Williamson once say: “Problems are a feature of life, not a bug“. And just like that, I shift my attention to what’s present at the moment, now. As I write this, in the comfort of my home, I realize how happy I am that I have so many like you, my dear reader, with whom I can share my thoughts and knowledge; and hopefully my words help you strengthen your bond with your Self. So, I am celebrating the possibility to contribute to you for the past four years and for many more to come.

I am celebrating me and I am celebrating you.

My work with people from all walks of life and from all corners of the world shows that we are great at celebrating something we perceive as “BIG”. When we’ve reached that big goal, gotten the promotion we fought for, received the well deserved award or landed a new client. We celebrate our birthdays and marriages, when a baby is born, when we win something, when the new year arrives, when we buy a house or a new car; and also, when we are supposed to celebrate because society or religion has conditioned us to do so.

BUT, what about those small, tiny daily wins? Those “not so important” things that we take for granted, like having clarity about a decision, resolving an issue in a calm conversation, or making the first baby step towards a higher goal. What about the 10 minutes of exercise you managed today or finally sending that email you postponed for weeks. And, what about the courage to ask for help, to say “no” to an extra commitment that doesn’t align with your priorities or to apologize sincerely and repair that relationship. Aren’t these moments worth celebrating?

What about those “basics”, like being alive, today! Being able to move, to see, to hear, to laugh. Isn’t that a reason for celebration?

There is a wonderful song by Goldkimono called “The Morning“, where he sings:

“Congratulations! Another day has come your way. You are here, you are free. You are alive! This is the true lottery! Not the money, not the house, not the car.”

The real jackpot is in the everyday miracles we often overlook. Celebrating these small wins isn’t just feel-good fluff, but it’s a powerful way to rewire your brain for more joy, resilience, and success

Diving deeper now into the neuroscience…

Imagine tomorrow, while you’re gently sipping your morning coffee or tea, instead of scrolling mindlessly, you pause to pat yourself on the back for simply getting out of bed on time. Sounds trivial to you, doesn’t it? Well, not to your brain. According to neuroscientist Andrew Huberman, dopamine is the “currency of motivation”and it gets released when we register authentic wins. This, in turn, amplifies neuroplasticity and new connections between neurons are created.

You’ve maybe heаrd the sentence “Neurons that fire together wire together”. Based on Hebb’s theory on synaptic plasticity, it was coined by neuroscientist Carla Shatz in 1992 (read her story here). Nothing new in the world of science, yet what does it mean in practice? It means that “where there is electrical activity in the brain, connections between neurons are built up, while others are pruned away”. In other words, or another “clichѐ” you might have heard, “where attention goes, energy flows”. This forms the neural basis for learning, memory, and habit formation.

So, it’s not magic! It’s your brain’s built-in reward system kicking in, creating a positive feedback loop that makes you crave more progress. The dopamine hits don’t just boost your mood in the moment – they literally reshape neural pathways, training your brain to associate effort with reward – making it easier to build new habits over time.

Why celebration matters:

• Celebration activates our reward system. Dopamine neurons respond not only to big rewards but to prediction and recognition of progress. This release makes us feel energised and ready to act again (see Schultz, research on dopamine and prediction error).
• Positive moments build resources. Positive emotions broaden our thinking and build resilience over time- the “broaden-and-build” idea from Barbara Fredrickson’s work.
• Gratitude and marking wins strengthen neural pathways. Repeating small habits of noticing and celebrating creates new circuits — neuroplasticity in action (see Norman Doidge and the science of brain change).
• Social celebration increases connection. Sharing small wins with others raises oxytocin and trust, boosts morale and improves overall performance, making teams more cohesive and creative.

Think of celebration as a tool to upgrade your mental software.

Recognizing small successes reinforces positive behaviors, reduces stress, and wards off burnout by fostering self-efficacy, the belief that you can handle what’s next.

So, how can you start? Keep it simple:

• Spot it: At the end of each day, jot down three small wins. No judgment, just facts.
• Savour it: High-five yourself, pat yourself on the back, share it with a friend, celebrate with colleagues, or dance it out. Make it fun!
• Repeat it: Over time, this habit builds momentum, turning “ordinary” days into extraordinary ones.

Imagine a world where we all celebrated a little more – being alive, connected, and capable. It might just rewire not only our brains but our entire outlook on life.

What’s one small win you’re celebrating today?

Share with your people. Share this with someone you believe needs it. Let’s build that celebratory loop together!

To finish,

My message for the month of February is:

Celebrate each day! You never know if it will be the last one.

Much love,

Viktoria ❤️